On the way home from the station today I noticed a large poster proudly announcing that Barry Norman has just launched his own range of pickled onions, called (rather provocatively I thought) Barry Norman Pickled Onions.
Finally! How many times during an idle moment has my mind has returned to the perennial question: "When, when, when will that late twentieth century broadcasting giant Barry Norman release his own brand of speciality pickles?"
In fact, since he bowed off our screens at the end of Film 98, I've often thought to myself: "What are you up to now that you're not reviewing films Barry Norman? I know you did a stint on BSkyB after handing Film 99 over to Jonathan Ross, but since 2002 you've been awfully quiet. I do hope you're spending all that extra time developing and perfecting the recipe for some kind of pickled snack."
It's certainly comforting to learn that this is exactly what he was doing, but although five years of solid pickle-related R&D may well have resulted in a superior product, it does mean he's a rather late entry to the film reviewer-endorsed pickled snack market.
After all The Observer's Philip French has had his Philip French's Pickled Gherkins on the shelves since 2003 and Mark Kermode's piccalilli, The Piccalilli of Mark Kermode, has been a supermarket best-seller for the last three years.
One can't help but wonder if the lucrative market that exists at the delicate intersection of film reviewing and vegetable preservation is already too crowded. Interestingly, the newest kid on the pickling block, Jason Solomons, had a complete flop with his Jason Solomon's Kickass Spicy Beet Box — pickled beetroot packaged rather controversially in a cardboard Tetrapak rather than the traditional glass jar.
Only time will tell if Barry's onions are a success but I do hope he's already back in the kitchen, working on another vinegary innovation. Because there's an old saying in the industry: if your pickles aren't moving forwards, they're moving backwards.
It seems that no amount of vinegar can slow the march of progress...
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