There is a young woman who obviously works in one of the offices at the end of my road who can be seen several times a day standing outside and smoking. Now the problem is that this young woman is, by my rough assessment, about seven months pregnant.
At the end of the day, I suppose it's her personal choice, and she certainly wouldn't be the first parent or parent-to-be to make an unwise choice on behalf of their child. But it is a surprisingly shocking site and does beg the question what is the appropriate response?
What are the rules on telling a stranger you think their actions are unacceptable even if it's a) none of your business, and b) not really affecting you?
It's very unclear what I should do. And confronting a lone woman in the final stages of pregnancy is not exactly have-a-go hero territory either.
If I intervene, let's face it, it's unlikely to go well. I'll make a polite, reasonable case for her to stop smoking until she's had the baby, she'll tell me to fuck off, and from then on I'll feel anxious every time I leave the house in case I have to walk past her puffing away like the Marlboro Man.
She must know it's not a good idea to be smoking. Other people must have said something to her. She must know that the world of opinion is not going to be supportive of her actions. But she does it anyway, so some random stranger coming up to her and pointing out the obvious isn't really going to make her or my world a better place.
Even if I did decide to say something, knowing my luck it would turn not to be a cigarette at all, but some new way of taking B12 supplements, or part of a course of GP-sanctioned marijuana to help treat her chronic M.E. And the shock of my sudden, verbal assault would cause her to go into premature labour and suddenly I'd be the bad guy.
So I've decided the best thing to do is just walk on by without judgement, and put something on this blog, so that at least you all know that I think it's wrong, but without me actually risking a difficult social encounter which could potentially backfire and make my life a bit awkward for a while.
So if I'm with a friend next time I see the woman who's smoking for two and they say: “Shouldn't we say something?”, I'll be able to reply “Don't worry, I've already made my opinion abundantly clear.”
And when that young woman comes across this blog — and it's only a matter of time — I think she's going to feel very sheepish indeed.






